The “How Hungover are You?” Test

You wake up and immediately recognize you’re hung-over, what do you do?
Before attempting anything, you must assess the severity of your hangover on a scale of 1 to 10. 1 being, I think I might feel a slight ting, and 10 being, waking up in your own vomit, your head feels like a obese elephant is stomping it, and your stomach cringes as though your may have ruptured an organ.hangover-test

We cannot stress enough how important this is first step is. For example, imagine waking up with a scale 9 hangover and immediately meeting your girlfriend parents – not a smart move. Instead of asking her father for a her hand in marriage you may be asking him for a tissue to wipe the chucks of burrito you spew all over him off his face. Case in point, if you have a scale 9 hangover, you’re going to want to save the introduction for another day.

People handle hangovers differently, and the way we handle our hangover says a lot about our personality. We want to help you handle your hangover to the best of your ability. But before you jump the gun and dive into remedies, take a long hard look at the hangover assessment scale below and determine your level of pain. You must recognize your own level of pain based on your own personal hangover history, however, we have supplied some basic guidelines to help you distinguish your level.

Hangover Assessment Scale 1 – 10

Level 1: Your hangover is hardly noticeable. In fact, you are not even sure if it’s there or not. The hangover is actually so weak that you wish you were more hungover so that you could feel a little bad about the fun you had the night before.

In this instance, carry on as normal.

Level 2: You feel slightly different. Your head is a little hazy.

Nothing to worry about.

Level 3: You have a light headache. Everything is a little too bright. You may not be in the highest spirits.

An extra hour of sleep here should result in you being able to have a normal day.

Level 4: Even though you brushed your teeth the night before, you can still taste the booze. You’re head is slightly swimming and the pillow feels a little harder than usual.

This is where we start to get into serious hangover territory. For the remaining hangover levels make sure to consult our hangover cure literature.

Level 5: You wake up and immediately regret last night, no matter how much fun you had. Your head hurts, your stomach hurts – this is not good.

Level 6: Your first thought is, “this is serious.” You try to sit up but layback down. The pressure in your head is so strong you feel like you’re snorkeling. Your head is attached to your pillow from your own alcohol-flavored drool.

Level 7: You are no longer a human being, you are a hangover. The real world seems to be only a distant memory in comparison to the issue at hand. Your stomach is destroyed, you brain swimming in booze, your world is upside down.

Level 8: Your clothes from last night are scattered everywhere. A thin line of vomit streams down your face. Your temples could supply all the base needed for a well attended rap concert. If someone sees you they will not recognize you because you look so terrible. Dogs growl at you, children hate you, the world is seeming over.

Level 9: You’re mouth tastes like a booze, puke and saliva cocktail. Your head feels as though someone hit it with a baseball bat. Getting up seems impossible. Leaving your room strikes you as the worst decision in the world. You’re not sure if you can stand. You barely have the ability to string words together.

Level 10: You waking up in your own vomit, your head feels like a obese elephant is stomping it, and your stomach feels as though your may have ruptured an organ. You cannot tell if you are still drunk or were in a car accident. You hallucinate your grandmother yelling at you, or something similar. Everyone hates you, you cannot rejoin society for some time.

Things to remember during assessment…

It is important to wait at least 20 minuets after waking up to assess your hangover. Many times the first visuals you see – a broken beer bottle, a stranger lying naked next to you, a strange dog snarling in your face – will cause you to asses incorrectly. The key is to focus on the level of discomfort caused by the hangover, and not the bad decisions you may or may not have made. One thing to always keep in mind is, all hangovers go away eventually!

Follow one of the links below for hangover cures.

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